in praise of my lovely 68 year old home help

One of 'the blighted houses' I speak of at the moment is, of course, this body of mine.  it creaks and groans and tells me oh so clearly it's got the 'blight'. Unlike a potato, I can't be thrown on a pyre to rid the curse.  No, that would no be a good idea!

So instead I have some 'little helpers'.  that is, home help and personal assistants. and a tired blighted body sure needs them.  very much so.

My home help was told if she didn't go on this course then she'd have to fund going on it in her own time.  That would be 4,000e.  "God I said, what sort of course is that".  Oh to help you understand 'the blights', bodies, people's needs, and how to support them through the blight and into the next world". 

Well she didn't actually put it quite that way...it was a course somewhat the opposite end-of-life- course to 'child development', more like 'geriatric development'. what she said was "why do I go on that course when I'm a housekeeper, cleaner".

She developed the theme..."I'm 68, I've been a home help for 30 years I'm a cleaner/housekeeper", and frankly that's all she wanted to be, and equally frankly, that's all I want her to be. But you see she's 68 and they want to create a 'professional' and she knows its a ploy to push her into retirement.

But she sees this as a 'nonsense' as I do. I don't want my home help to be a pseudo-counsellor-cum-geriatrician. I want...no need...her to clean my floors, my toilet, and peel my potato's and bring my bin down to the footpath on Thursdays. And happily that's what SHE wants to do and happily she's brilliant at this, more brilliant then the young 'uns who want a 'profession' in home help. who seem to think 'cleaning' is somehow beneath them and resent it.  This is fostered by the 'development of the home help profession' , which slowly and surely is 'killing off' our cleaners.

Home helps are no longer  'cleaners', they are more like 'tidy-uppers' .  except for my 68 year old...oh and a very good young 'un too, both expert CLEANERS.

'Tidy-uppers' straighten the bed, that does not necessarily mean MAKE the bed, they pick up things from the floor, or bring dirty washing from bedroom or bathroom and shove in washing machine, or stack the dishes in dishwasher.

They cannot (health & safety) move the sofa to brush or hoover underneath or behind.  They cannot move a bed, clean the top edge of the skirting board... the cannot clean the glass door into my kitchen where my dog likes do a  'paint by nose' masterpiece, a great picture of whatever comes out her nose!  the 'cannot clean', is not because of the 'nose stuff' danger but the glass danger.

on no account can a Home help wipe dog wee or poo from the floor, heavens no...health and safety.  but should the need arise she's trained to wipe my bum and clean my toilet.

the crises in our home help service here is that everyone has to feel 'fulfilled' and just  cleaning a sick or disabled woman or mans house seems less 'fulfilling' than going on a fancy course and calling yourself a 'carer'.

I want to scream from my roof top (where the Hitchcock crows gather nightly) "come back home help CLEANER, I love you".